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How to Rediscover Fun & Joy in Your Relationship
Raising kids and keeping a life together can be boring and stressful sometimes
I recently came across a post in a group I’m in. The post was by a mom who runs her own business, is married, and raising a toddler with her spouse. She described her marriage as a happy marriage but said that she and her husband don’t have much, if anything, in common and that he finds the tasks of everyday living joyless which causes tension for them.
I found her post interesting because most people, describing having little in common with their spouse and tension between them over everyday living, would not describe their marriage as happy. Yet she did and she was quite sincere about it.
So I gave her question some thought and posted a response. Another group member asked me to write a blog about it and so… here it is.
So let’s start at the beginning.
Why do you define the marriage as happy?
If you feel like there are problems or issues in your marriage, but you still describe it as happy, you need to think about what that means. If you still think it’s a happy marriage, then that must mean there are still good things about it.
So what makes you define it as happy? What are the things you two do, or the qualities in each other, that make you feel it’s a happy marriage? Incorporate more of that, bringing that out in each other or doing those things with each other, more often.
Whether it’s things you do, qualities you enjoy in each other, or interests you both share and enjoy talking about, find ways to bring those more to the forefront. If that means occasionally letting a household chore go undone, playing hooky from work, or being more intentional about date nights, figure out what you need to do to put more of the things that make your marriage a happy one front and center.
